Quill #80 - Skeletons (2010)

Dana and I walked through the haunted house.
Mechanical ghouls jumped at us,
Vampires sprang from coffins,
Ghosts floated on wires to spook us.
Then we came to a completely dark room.
We were just nervous enough,
Knowing that something more, as yet unseen,
Would surprise us anew that
We couldn't move forward.

In spite of the silly nature of all
We had encountered, we knew,
Just knew, that the next ghastly thing,
Whatever it might be,
Would be the last straw.
Frozen, Dana and I waited for
Someone to save us, another customer,
An employee, anyone who would
Step ahead of us and trigger what we could not.

We stayed there until the owner came
To investigate our long presence in his
Fun House attraction.
Slowly, kindly, he led us the
Six feet through the last room,
Empty of all but darkness and air,
To the exit door which had been
Just one fear too far away.

Quill #5 - Texture (1998)

At first I tried drinking it in the usual fashion,
Warm and straight out of the container,
But it just made me want to gag.
Not from the flavor!
After a lifetime of texture,
I wasn't ready to lose variety in my diet.
Never a wine connoisseur
The age or origin of a liquid didn't matter to me.
I was hooked on texture,
And began to experiment with several techniques
To see what could be stomached.
Air drying,
Extractions,
Temperature changes,
Even a bit of gentle cooking,
And, eventually,
Realized that all were palatable.
I guess the form doesn't matter as much as the content.
In any case, I was able to effect
Such a wide variety of textures,
My friends began asking for recipes.
Instead, I began a catering service.
My specialty,
A full eight-course dinner,
Was the favorite among my clients.
I would begin with mulled wine
And a pastry thin crisp
To crumble into the soup.
Then, a fine simulated steak with gravy,
Followed by warm pudding.
Some guests would balk at the cooked items,
Until they tried them.
Chewy, moist drops in candy mold shapes
Were the piece de resistance.
No one ever turned away from those.
Animal and people shapes were the most popular,
Cartoon characters for the children's parties.
Drops were difficult to time correctly,
But well worth the effort.
If all else failed to satisfy,
Red velvet cake with bright whipped topping was a crowd pleaser,
For any party, any age.
More often than not,
My clients would groan away from the table,
Marvelling at how many different ways I'd managed
To prepare their favorite food.
Which is how I made a name for myself - "Dan's Macabres" -
Caterer to my vampire kin.